We learn when we experience and vice versa. Experience is what makes you learn the most beautiful and significant lesson you have ever learned from books. To exemplify, the 9/11 incident is emotionally too atrocious abhorrence to those who witnessed it, saw the twin-towers on fire, intense commotion, and collapse of the buildings after terrorists hit them with plane. It's too touchy subject. On the other hand, reading and listening about it from second party is certainly a mind-blowing horror story, but the degree of the effect is very minimal. That is to say, reading and listening is not as comprehensible as seeing and experiencing. Therefore, more you experience, more you will learn.
Last week, I learned a pregnant objective lesson. My little boy, Pratya taught me. At one point, I had to kneel down and pray to God for strength to stand up again. I was never convicted of my sins against my parents so powerfully that made me feel so disgraced. I had made an issue of my father's disciplinary actions on me, and I never tried to be close with him. I hurt him for too many years without knowing how the hurt would be like. Yes, many years! Now, I felt hurt very badly. My heart was cut into pieces and shattered onto ground when my baby stopped calling me "Ba". It was my fault. My three demerits were: (1) I held his arms when he was given three shots (every baby hates it), (2) I did not hold him in my arm next day when he was crying and feeling insecure in a friend's house, and (3)I raised my voice when he was fussily crying. Literally, he avoided me. He otherwise used to call me constantly; I mean, he calls me for everything except the time when he has to eat from his mom.
Later on, I realized how sensitive babies are. They also want us to treat them as special individual which is they are. They feel very secure with their parents. And if we yell at them, how can a baby feel secure and loved? In fact, it took almost a week for us to reconcile with each other. Else he would enjoy playing with me, but he never addressed me affectionately- "Ba". Maybe, he got a notion that I was just like another babysitter or someone he is seeing everyday!
No comments:
Post a Comment